Known Griefers Discusses the WarZ Situation

If you've been anywhere near the Internet in the past 48 hours, you've presumably heard some rumblings about WarZ. The zombie survival game launched on Steam earlier this week, and quickly shot up the best-selling charts. Some players felt misled by the game's...less than factual description, though.

All of this outrage eventually snowballed into a giant clusterfuck, the likes of which have rarely been seen. Valve decided to pull the game from its Steam service for the time being, although players who already bought WarZ can still access it.

We here at the KGB offices were watching from the sidelines, and a fairly entertaining coversation sprung from it. If you want, you can follow along at home, it's just like being there!

The players in this act are Patrick Ronk, Surpriselove and myself, Chris Linendoll. Enjoy!

This conversation starts with the sharing of this thread on Reddit, encapsulating the entire drama so far.

Surpriselove: 
Whelp, that is the most neutral post from Reddit as I will ever see. Not 100% accurate with such thingslike "The Developer make a forum post announcing the bans of a lot of hackers. However, a lot of legitimate players and banned as well." By "a lot" you would think of.. A LOT of people.. but no, I think the total number of wrongful bans were around 50 people. That was fixed in a matter of hours


Patrick Ronk:
KILL THE VOICE OF REASON!!! YARRRRRRRR


Surpriselove:
Also, Gamespy? I knew they were a sad company, but the push for an article that would clearly draw attention for ad sales was despicable. I can't loath Gamespy more now for the clear manipulation of the situation and cash grab. Although, speaking of making $$$, this made me laugh:

Bottom line: I'll play the shit out of this game, as it is, right now, and have a fun as hell time with my friends. Haters gonna hate.


Patrick Ronk:
I'm still going to wait and see how it compares to the DayZ standalone.


Surpriselove: 
Well, the Day Z standalone, announced in October, was dated to be out December. Now, that doesn't sound rushed or anything? Oh, and they will be using the Same engine as Arma II. Same map, slightly redone, and adding in NPCs. Tell me again how that doesn't sound exactly like what War Z did in relation to War Inc?


Christopher Linendoll:
When did you get a job at Hammerpoint Interactive?


Surpriselove:
It's a part time gig. Knowing the facts is my full time job.


Patrick Ronk:
I don't really care about its history. I'm not even that interested in these boring zombie MMO's. I just want to see how they compare.



Christopher Linendoll:
I don't think people are ragging on the game, so much as the misleading nature of the developers' actions so far. Shitty customer service is gonna get you killed in these days of Reddit witchhunts. 


Surpriselove:
I like that. Basically I got into War Z before ALL THE FUCKING HEMORRHOID INDUCING DRAMA. Shit makes my ass bleed so hard I stopped shoving tampons up there and moved right on to large rolls of bounty paper towels. It's a good game. It has a loyal following. The Devs are Russians with the people skills of a third trimester abortion clinic. PR does NOT exist and if it does show it's ugly, broken English spouting face I only pay attention to any mention of something that effects me.. like an update, which there are plenty of. 


Christopher Linendoll:
To be honest, you're the first person I've heard actually speak to the quality of the game. If you enjoy it, that's great. I personally think those games are interesting, if not in execution, then at least in concept. The fact that the dev is Russian, and possibly capitalizing on an old IP modified to be a DayZ clone isn't really the issue. It's the fact that these games are EXTREMELY community-focused, and WarZ's community leaders seem to be the most tone-deaf people in the world. I hope to Christ they hire a PR firm, to sort their shit out for them, otherwise, it's all going downhill fast.




There you have it, folks! A typical coversation in the KGB offices. Full of potty mouth, offensive jokes, and more! Happy Holidays!

Christopher Linendoll loves skooten-frootey. Follow him on Twitter.